The word “should” is more of a sentiment than a word. A golf ball flubs into the trees. “I should have kept my knees bent on the follow through!” A business investment tanks. “I should have been smarter about where I put my money!” A cheat in a diet. “I should not have eaten those cupcakes!”
The word “should” is a dangerous one because it interrupts our romantic notions about what we feel should actually be happening. We want to make a decision, and never falter. We want to stick with a commitment for life. We want to be braver than we’ve been before. A new day, a fresh start. Before and after. That was then, this is now.
Only catch is, Life doesn’t always work like that. In fact, more often than not, the way things unfold is anything but romantic. At least, not the “cut and dry” romanticism of stories and movies.
In a way, the stumbles and falls that cause us to want to use the word “should” are indicative of a more lovely sloppiness. The way Life actually works turns out to be weirdly more of a “should” than the “should” in our brains. And this, in itself, is kind of romantic.